FRONT Magazine
Archive for March, 2013

SATURDAY SOFA CINEMA: THE INCREDIBLE HULK

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So, did you see Hulk? Yeah, you did? Well, we thought it was good, ok? It had a bit too much talking in it and that, but the Hulk throws a fucking tank bare miles so shhhhhhh. Either way, a lot of people didn’t like it and so they decided to try and make a newer, better version to make up for it. It’s lucky too, because they ended up making a newer, better version – yeah, he doesn’t throw a tank, but it’s still good.

This time there’s no real origin story to bog things down, and instead it’s just a lot of hulk-smashing and explosions. MUCH MORE LIKE IT. We don’t want ‘talking’ and ‘acting’, we want ‘hitting’ and ‘crushing’ — they’re the real ingredients for a real movie.

In The Incredible Hulk we’ve got Ed Norton taking over from Eric Bana (and preceding Mark Ruffalo) and he’s going up against Tim Roth who has been holding in a poo for so long that he’s gone insane and transformed into some sort of gigantic, veiny monster. Obviously Tim Roth gets very angry and so decides that he wants to fight the Hulk and so they fight each other. That is the story.

This time around they’ve included a lot more action, which is essentially what The Hulk is all about — nobody wants to see a giant green chunk of muscle sitting in his pants eating a Curly-Wurly and fiddling with his still-tiny bollocks. What everyone wants to see is a giant green chunk of muscle smashing the living FUCK out of everybody and everything in its path, which is what HE DOES. The best bit is where he rips a motorbike in half and uses each half as giant, metal boxing gloves.

LOOK, WHAT WE’RE TRYING TO SAY IS YOU DON’T HAVE TO THINK ABOUT THIS FILM TOO MUCH THAT’S WHY IT’S GOOD.

It’s on ITV at 3:20pm.

KESHIA IS AN UNORTHODOX LOLLIPOP LADY

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And that’s an unorthodox Zebra Crossing. In fact, this is going to cause accidents, not prevent them — we’re scrapping the whole thing.

See more of Keshia HERE.

WHAT WE LEARNED FROM BEING AT THE BRITS 2013

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Day two for FRONT at The BRITS 2013 in Tignes was a bit of a write-off. The snow just didn’t wanna stop for the riders up on the slopes which made it difficult for the competitions  but that didn’t mean we couldn’t party the fuck out!

That night we traveled 3,000+ ft up the mountain to party with the riders and punters in what turned out a proper fun eventful night. Crazy amounts of boozing, crazy amounts of laughs, fuck loads of dancing with from tunes being spun by The Nextmen and a fuck load of happy people (probably some with sore heads in the morning!).

It was rad, ’cause a train took us up at 9pm and we stayed up till 1:30am and just had to drink our body weight, which we definitely did. It snowed up there… a lot! But every person there couldn’t of had a sicker time.

The next day saw the halfpipe comp won by 24 year old Olympic hope Ben Kilner and budding talent Katie Ormerod both taking home gold medals despite facing a stiff field of competition.

Check back for video footage!

 

NEW GHOSTFACE FOR EVERYBODY! YAY!

Ghostface’s new album is out this spring and we cannot bloody wait. It’s a weird horror/crime concept album that uses classic Ennio Morricone scores in – this is going to be big.

WHAT WE LEARNED FROM PAINTBALLING WITH TYLER, THE CREATOR

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Yesterday we went paintballing with Tyler, The Creator (didn’t you read the headline?), and it was fun. We wanted to interview him but we weren’t allowed. If you didn’t know, Tyler, The Creator is a rather humorous rapper and sort-of leader of LA hip-hop collective Odd Future (the one with Frank Ocean in it – you know him don’t you?). He’s over in the UK at the mo and instead of doing normal press interviews like a boring common-or-garden rapper, he decided to shoot high-powered paintball guns at us instead. GREAT. Here are 20 things we learned from going paintballing with Tyler, The Creator:

  • The English weather is really shit all the fucking time.
  • American rappers also think the English weather is really shit all the fucking time.
  • Tyler, The Creator and his mates act a lot like hyperactive teenagers. So would we if we had that much money.
  • Tyler, The Creator does not like to listen to paintball stewards giving out safety information – instead he likes to shout “SUCK A DICK” from the back of the crowd. His mate also asked if “hand-to-hand combat could be used” and another asked if he could “take the guns out of other people’s hands” – the answers were no. American paintball sounds a lot more fun.
  • If you are a famous rapper and you go paintballing you will be given much better guns than everyone else and also free gloves. Although to be fair, it was Tyler and about four mates against 30-odd journalists, and journalists are well-known for their proficiency in physical combat situations.
  • Going paintballing without gloves is a shit thing.
  • Waiting around in the cold without gloves for a long time sucks massively.
  • You have forgotten how terrifying paintballing is.
  • Paintball guns are extremely unreliable – for the whole of the first game our gun jammed and we were unable to fire anything. WHOOOOO!! PAINTBALL!!!
  • Tyler, The Creator is very brave – at one point he ran out into the middle of the playing field, against 30 people and was shot at mercilessly. Once in the face.
  • We are pussies compared to him. We didn’t get shot once.
  • ACTUALLY WAIT that probably just means we’re amazing at paintball.
  • Tyler, The Creator likes Adventure Time and Rocko’s Modern Life.
  • Tyler, The Creator HATES it when restaurant staff refill his water before he’s finished the glass. We mean he REALLY HATES it.
  • Cold Skittles are worse than room-temperature Skittles.
  • Tyler, The Creator likes a British rapper who raps over ‘chilled out, jazzy beats’ but has forgotten his name. Someone suggested Ghostpoet. We’ll never know.
  • Tyler, The Creator is not happy with the cereal selection on offer in England. The lack of American cereals like Froot Loops and Lucky Charms irked him somewhat. As did our selection of English sweets.
  • It is very unlikely that Odd Future will ever get any acts from other countries into their collective – Tyler said he liked to keep it within his own group of mates. Collaborations are a different thing though – he’s got a couple of guests on his new album (Erykah Badu and Pharrell) and he said he’d love to work with Eminem eventually.
  • Tyler, The Creator’s friends enjoy throwing chips and burgers.
  • Tyler, The Creator has an amazing life and we are jealous.

Tyler, The Creator’s new album Wolf is out 1 April.

DOWNLOAD BRING ME THE HORIZON’S ANTIVIST FOR FREE!!!

If you weren’t already aware, we fucking love the new Bring Me The Horizon album (did you read the review in FRONT 180?) and Antivist is an absolute banger. The balls-out anger is met with Oli screaming the C-word, which is never a bad thing for a song. If you want to know what the FRONT office sounds like at least once a day, then click HERE for your free download.

WE’RE OUT AT THE BRITS 2013!

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This week we’ve been out on the mountains of Tignes in the French Alps for the 2013 BRITS snow and music festival.

The event started on Tuesday, but we didn’t rock up to the until Wednesday when we saw the Protest ski slopestyle event take place all the way up the mountain. The weather couldn’t have been better (we’re burnt as fuck, should have worn that sunscreen like our mums told us) for it. We saw Julian Ball and 12 year old Madi Rowlands fight off strong opposition to become the slopestyle don and doness.

Just before we arrived to shred the piste, Andy Nudds picked up a grand after winning the Bangers & Cash Rail Jam in what was a fucking awful day weather-wise up the top.

After what seemed like a fucking decade up the mountain yesterday we hit up the 90s party thrown at the Blue Girl club. The night consisted of a fuck-ton of Jäger and us judging peoples fancy dress (Del Boy & Rodney were definitely not a 90s thing, were they?) and we’re now nursing a horrendous hang over.

Check back tomorrow for more news from the BRITS.

GAME ON! IT’S FRONT ONE HUNDRED AND EIGHTY!

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Insert credit and press start motherfuckers, FRONT 180 is out today and it’s packing a killer combo of headshots and fatalities to send you to the next level. If you haven’t noticed from these references, FRONT 180 is the gaming issue (because Xbox 360 divided by PlayStation 2 equals FRONT 180) and it has more goodies inside it than a really big weapons crate. Continue?

FRONT180

  • We chat to wrestling’s Mr Nice MICK FOLEY about his rules to live your life by.
  • CHARLI XCX answers is put in the hot seat for our infamous 20 Questions.
  • We take a look at the EVIL DEAD franchise and find out why it’s so important to horror.
  • LA punks FIDLAR take us to a skate park and tell us how to get mega-drunk.
  • We introduce you to the brand new FRONT Girl, TASMIN.
  • The coolest man in metal WES BORLAND talks us through tentacle porn and taking acid.
  • Alt Girl JOSEPHINE guides us through her love for electronica and anime.
  • FALL OUT BOY’s Andy Hurley takes us on a tour of his inky skin.
  • We spend a day with REBECCA CROW, MEL CLARKE and JESS DAVIES in their world of gaming
  • KILLSWITCH ENGAGE tell us why they love Guinness and hate Jersey Shore.

AND A SHIT-TON MORE COMING YOUR WAY FASTER THAN SONIC ON A SPEED BINGE.

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 JOSEPHINE                        REBECCA, JESS AND MEL                                        TASMIN

FRONT 180 is in stores NOW. Go get it and read it cover-to-cover 20 times without using cheat codes. Get your copy HERE.

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