In anticipation of Arrested Development’s long awaited return on Netflix, The National Public Radio have mapped out and articulated all of the running gags from the show, which is LOADS.
You can check out/lose your mind to the entire thing HERE.
No-one does metal like the Germans. Any music festival you go to in the world you know the Germans will be out-drinking, out-partying and generally out-metalling you and your sissy mates. So why not go in at the deep end this summer and head over to Loreley in Germany for Metalfest? The weekend, 20-22 June, is being headlined by the mighty SLAYEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRR, as well as featuring killer performances from Children Of Bodom, Down, Testament, Kvelertak and Soulfly to name a few. And we’re giving the chance for you and a mate to go over their with your travel paid for, a free t-shirt and a free CD. WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT?!
To enter, answer the piece-of-piss question below:
The intense punk ‘n’ rollers Trigger Effect are dropping their new album What’s Left To Eliminate? on 27 May. It’s their first proper release in the UK and it’s fucking wicked! It’s like The Bronx slapping around Fucked Up for musical kicks. You’ll love it.
They’re on tour next month and you should probably go. We’ll be there and we’re always right.
Sat 8 June: Fighting Cocks, Kingston
Sun 9 June: Cavern, Exeter
Mon 10 June: Beercart Arms, Canterbury
Tues 11 June: Bar Bloc, Glasgow (free entry show)
Weds 12 June: Old Blue Last, London (free entry show)
Thurs 13 June: Joiners, Southampton
Fri 14 June: Crauford Arms, Milton Keynes
Sat 15 June: Wheatsheaf, Oxford
Never one to do things by the book, Josh Homme and co. have stopped releasing straight-forward music videos to tease their upcoming album, instead they’ve created this bonkers 15 minute animation with snippets of the new record entwined.
…Like Clockwork is out 3 June.
What are you doing this weekend? Nothing? Exactly. MCM Comic Con is in London this weekend, 24-26 May. There’s the first play of the upcoming Deadpool game, loads of special guests including Shaun Of The Dead/Hot Fuzz director Edgar Wright promoting his new movie The World’sEnd and sexy lady Camilla Luddington who voiced Lara Croft in the latest Tomb Raider game.
For ticket information as well as the full list of guests and exhibits visit the MCM website HERE.
Ever heard the story about this dude that proper hated this other dude because this other dude fucked this dude’s wife? Dude, slack, you don’t go around fucking people’s wives… not a good look. Well, anyway, this was back in the day when people were fucking bonkers and killed each other for having different coloured skin and because they thought people had magic powers and shit… so, true to the time, this dude got a gun and went to shoot this ‘wife-fucking’ dude in the motherfucking head. He wasn’t, like, ex-military or anything, so he was a truly crap shot, he missed completely and instead sunk the bullet into a tree on this guy’s land. Murder fail. Cool artillery skills bro!
Years passed, the dude who got cheated on died and the wife-shagging dude lived a long, healthy, happy life (bastard) on his big-ass farm in the middle of the Cotswolds, or wherever it was. One day he decided he wanted to remodel his land and part of that remodelling process was the removal of some of the trees. He hired a demolition chappy, who unknowingly rigged up the bullet-laden tree with explosives, pushed the button (or stroked the donkey… pulled the yarn… you know… whatever you did back in the day to detonate shit) – and BOOM – the tree was no more, obliterated into nothingness. However, within that tree the bullet laid in wait… and where do you think that bullet went?
The bullet left the tree at speed and drove itself into the wife-shagging dude’s skull, killing him instantly!!!
Yeah, I know right! WTFFFFFFFF!!!?
FATE IN ACTION – or is it just a coincidence?
We’re not going to get into an existential debate regarding the validity of various different philosophical theories on the subjects of free will vs determinism; fate vs. chaos; grand-plan-godliness vs. nihilism, and the like – but what I am going to do, is say this…
…sometimes – doesn’t the most fucking CRAZY shit happen!
More on what I mean by that, complete with an INSANE personal example next time – but for now let’s talk shit with a music producer, who has Skrillex quaking in his small, yet highly fashionable boots.