FRONT Magazine

SATURDAY SOFA CINEMA: THE ‘BURBS

the-burbs
Everyone thinks their neighbours are weird – that time you caught them rubbing their bums on the living room window contributed to that – but what if they were even weirder than you thought? Like, so weird they were almost scary?

WHAT WE’RE TRYING TO SAY IS WHAT IF THEY WERE FUCKING CANNIBALS OR SOMETHING?

Well, it would be shit, wouldn’t it? Well, pity poor Tom Hanks in The ‘Burbs then, because that’s exactly what he reckons is going on. It’s one of those Rear Window-type affairs where someone sees something and gets increasingly paranoid that some crazy-arse shit is gwarn in their quiet little cul-de-sac.

We’ve just realised we can’t actually talk much more about this film without letting you know whether they are actually cannibals or not, which is a shame. We can tell you they’re not dragons, or ghosts, or time-travellers or any of that shit, so that’ll give you a slightly narrower idea of what to expect.

Erm…

Tom Hanks is good.

But then he’s pretty much always good isn’t he?

Look, it’s good ok – just watch it. Hopefully it’ll help you forget about seeing your neighbours’ wet arses pressed up against the glass the other day. That can only be a good thing. And Corey Feldman is the absolute tits in this.

It’s on ITV at 3.55pm.

We must say however, as this is on in the day, it is actually the cut TV version – the uncut one is much better. You might not care about silly things like missing out on a couple of swear words though? Just us? Fuck Fudge it.

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