FRONT Magazine

TWENTY QUESTIONS WITH MATT CAUGHTHRAN FROM THE BRONX FROM AGES AGO


We did a 20 Questions interview with Matt Caughthran from The Bronx a few years ago, in October 2009 according to our computer, but it never ran in the mag. We can’t remember why. It’s safe to say we were pretty drunk in October 2009. But he’s playing Groezrock this weekend with The Bronx, so here it is, a blast from the past:

1. Who’s your favourite Star Wars character?
It’s gotta be Darth Vader. I understand the duality of man, and the concept of the struggle between right and wrong is something I indentify with. A lot of times I end up making choices I shouldn’t make – I’m a Darth Vader kinda guy.

2. When did you last throw up?
I don’t even remember. I don’t throw up. I’ll do anything and everything I can to not throw up. I can hold my liquor pretty well.

3. If you could throw one person off TV into a pen of lions, who would it be?
That’s a good one. Maybe Rush Limbaugh. He’s a classic Republican, very conservative kind of American asshole. He’s like a George Bush character, except extremely overweight. He’s a pointless figure in our little world over here.

4. What superpower would you most like?
Being able to read minds. I’d read the minds of police officers, government officials, ex girlfriends… just about everyone on the planet. I’d go insane, but I think that’s true of all power. Whatever. I’m already crazy.

5. Would you rather have no legs or no arms?
Shit, that’s fucking tough. Can I lose a leg and a arm and keep my left leg and my right arm? I like to eat, hug, shake hands and throw baseballs, and if you have one leg maybe you could use a crutch or a fake leg and still kick stuff.

6. What makes an awesome night out properly awesome?
A lot of friends, lots of drinks and good music – I think that’s a foolproof list of ingredients for a great night. I think if you can end with a little late-night food and wake up without a hangover, that’s perfect.

7. What’s the first album you ever bought?
Iron Maiden’s Powerslave. I was obsessed with the track Two Minutes To Midnight – it was the first song that ever scared me. I remember hearing the line ‘The golden goose is on the loose’ and thinking ‘Man, what the fuck is he talking about?’, but it sounded so great. My mum started to think I was worshiping Satan so she hid my records.

8. What will your funeral be like?
I think its gonna be a party. I’ve thought about it a lot. I think a lot of my friends are gonna show up, and everyone will be happy. I do a pretty good job trying to live a happy life, doing whatever I wanna do.

9. Who’s the biggest arsehole famous person you’ve ever met?
Jerry Cantrell from Alice in Chains. I always loved that band and looked up to them, and he’s an amazing guitar player, but I met him and he was a royal asshole.

10. Have you got any phobias?
I can’t eat whole beans, they gross me out. If they’re mashed up I can eat them but not the whole thing. It’s a consistency thing, it feels like having a cockroach in my mouth. If I ate one I’d throw up instantly. Seriously, any kind of bean. A refried bean, a kidney bean, a fucking garbanzo bean. Anything from the bean family. I can’t fuck with ‘em.

11. Do you do the Myspace/Facebook/Twitter thing? [NOTE: This interview took place in 2009, when MySpace still worked]
I never did them, but I just started a Facebook to keep in touch with everyone I meet on tour. I’m not a big fan of MySpace. The other band members do a good job on our MySpace, but I’m not really an internet kinda guy. I just discovered email a year ago.

12. What’s the most you’ve ever needed the toilet?
It’s always in situations when it’s really bad, like when you’re surrounded by porta-potties at Reading or Leeds. That’s when you always really need it, and that’s when its always a fucking nightmare, cos catering at festivals will always fuck your stomach up, but everything’s just covered in shit.

13. What’s the worst idea you’ve ever had?
I had an idea for a downloadable MP3 toilet flush. Like, you’d download a panther growl so when you flushed your toilet it would make the noise of a panther growling. The toilet would have a little speaker on it, and you’d go to iTunes for downloadable toilet flushes, and you just plug your toilet in and you’re off and running. That was probably a bad idea.

14. What’s your alcoholic drink of choice?
When I’m not drinking beer I like vodka. Vodka and soda water with a fresh wedge of lime in there, that’s a really good drink. So beer, vodka soda and tequila shots for me.

15. What’s the stupidest thing you’ve ever said to a girl you liked?
One time when I was really young I got a girls phone number and I may or may not have called her that same night and tried to have phone sex.

16. What’s the most illegal thing you (or “a friend of yours”) have ever done?
I’m not really a wild lawbreaker. I do a lot of little things – driving without a license, drinking underage, but I don’t really look to break any laws. I think the majority of California drives without a license or insurance. That’s just kind of the way it goes.

17. What have you seen that you really wish you could un-see?
I saw a guy get shot and die in front of me. When the band was first starting we were all standing outside a club smoking and these three dudes walked up, and all of a sudden two of them turned on the other one and shot him about seven times and ran off. It was fucked up, man.

18. What’s the worst injury you’ve ever received?
When I broke the top of my foot, that sucked pretty bad. Someone stomped on my foot in the crowd, and the top got smashed in, and we had to stop the show early because I was in so much pain. It took a long time to heal, and my other foot got smashed in as well, so I had two broken feet for quite a while. That was hell on earth.

19. Why should people check out Mariachi El Bronx? [NOTE: Yeah, this was 2009, before Mariachi El Bronx got really big.]
Because it’s something original. It’s a group of punk rock dudes from Los Angeles diving in and making a traditional mariachi record, and that’s something you’ll probably never ever see again. It’s a great honest record and it’s good music.

20. What’s the punchline to your favourite ever joke?
“I’m looking for the man who shot my paw”.

The Bronx’s website is here, and they’ll be at Groezrock this weekend. BANG!

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