He hates you, though.

[nicked off of Three Frames]

According to this, Nike have applied for a patent for what are pretty much power laces. YES.

Seriously, look at it! We were just enjoying some delicious salt and vinegar snacks in the office when we stumbled upon this bastard. Somewhere in the world right now, crisp-bumming prat Gary Lineker is probably creaming his pants.

Can you beat this? Send your giant foodstuffs to front@frontarmy.co.uk and prove it.

She looks like she could certainly use it.

Dinosaur Pile-Up are all set to release their debut album in little over a month, and this new single and video has certainly got us popping a boner.

Make sure you catch them live in all their tit-rocking glory on their October tour – deets on their MySpaz, like.