Is wanking over someone else cheating?
No, absolutely not. But do yourself a favour and don’t tell your girlfriend you’ve done it.
Is it OK to grope random people in big crowds?
I hate repulsive cock monkeys like you.
Do tattoos put off posh birds?
No way. As a general rule, the posher the girl, the more she craves a bit of rough.
As part of her monthly FRONT column, Aunt Agony, Von has been running the rule over your sex-related issues for longer than our alcohol problem allows us to remember. Like we say in the mag, “She doesn’t beat around the bush, unless she’s had a few pints and feels a bit playful,” which occurs really quite often, by all accounts. Before said ventures, Von tends to love randomly dressing up as a zombie for a night out, which is fucking ace, to be fair.
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Recent posts featuring Von
- THROW YOURSELF BACK TO ISSUE 153! WOOOOAAAARRRHHH!!
Check out this awesome throwback (BECAUSE IT’S FUCKING THURSDAY) gallery to issue 153, with Lacey Banghard, Charlotte Anderson, Poppy Thompson and Von. Just look at it. Look how good it is! It’s better than your gallery! Your gallery is terrible! Also, why don’t you go and buy it? You can buy it! Look how buy […]
- TEN SEXY GIRLS... WITH WACKY WALLPAPERS
You know what would brighten up your beige houses? Some lovely FRONT girls! But they wouldn’t ever step foot in your shit-hole of a shed, so you’ll have to make do with some new wallpaper instead. To give you some ideas, check out Courtnie, Von, Natasha, Arabella, Jess, Hettie, Mel, Helen, Nicole, and Alysha in this Ten […]
- TEN SEXY GIRLS... LOVING RUGS!
This is your brain. This is your brain on rugs… or something. For today’s Ten Sexy Girls… gallery we’re bringing you some of the sexiest girls to ever feature in FRONT enjoying the benefits of a small piece of carpet. They’re great for hiding beer stains and cigarette burns, so buy one for next time […]
- HAVE A BOXING DAY THROWBACK TO FRONT 175
Fucking hell… Christmas got out of hand didn’t it? Well we’re here to help you recover by throwing you back to FRONT 175 in one of those Throwback Thursday dealies. If you didn’t pick up the issue at the time (AND WHY NOT?!) you can buy it here and see for yourself just how sick […]
- THROWBACK THURSDAY! ISSUE 137 WAS VERY SEXY
You’d better be reading this at 88 miles per hour, because it involves TIME TRAVEL. Specifically, it involves travelling back to issue 137, back in the mists of time. Hecksafuckgeddon, it was a stormer. Not only did it contain arguably the fittest picture of Von ever, it had a cover shoot featuring Seren, Hettie and […]